Has you partner ever asked you for a threesome? Why is there a double standard?
Let me kick this off with my rules for a threesome.
Sunnydelyte21′s Rule For a Threesome
Rule 1: If you have deep feelings for the guy, you might not want to do it.
Rule 2: DON’T PLAN EVERYTHING OUT. Let things happen on there own. You can plan the who, maybe even the day or night. But don’t ever say it has to happen on this day.
Rule 3: The 3rd person, (depending on the situation) should never be someone the guy has ever dealt with.
Rule 4: Alcohol should be optional. But you don’t have to get pissy drunk, just get a little buzzed and calms the nerves.
Rule 5: Whatever happens happens enjoy and be merry!!!
My two friends and I were having a chat about Threesomes. We were talking about what could happen in different scenarios.
One of my friends explains a threesome she experienced. It was planned out by the guy, who asked for the threesome. Although, when it came down to it he was nervous. He went wrong by actually planning it out to its entirety. He put too much pressure on himself. Needless to say, it went down and after my home girl went to wash. She came back to see the dude fucking the girl and was shocked and upset. Now one might think what? But she was upset because when it was going down the guy and girl barely touched for whatever reason and it seemed that there was a discomfort between the two. Then when she leaves and come back he all in and so is she. Now, she looks at him different.
Why? Because she had deep feelings for him, Rule #1 was broken.
I, then explain my somewhat of a threesome experience. My ex and my home girl planned it and boy was I shocked. I came to her crib and he was there. And the attack went into motion. He came up on me and started to kiss me and take my pants down. After which, he began giving me head and she joined in. It felt crazy, weird, and very good. There was a lot of kissing between us and after which I was ready to go, but she stopped me and said “you guys enjoy” and left.
She knew of my feelings for him and his feelings for me. So she knew that taking it there could’ve very well cost us our friendship and I respect her for that. He knew I wanted to experience that and made it happen.
Although there was no liquor involved, he helped relax me and calm my nerves.
Have you ever had a threesome? Did it go well? Also, explain what maybe some of your rules.
I had always dreamed of having a threesome but never followed through with one. For a man it is always in the back of our minds to never pay too much attention to the “other” woman. In past relationships opportunities presented themselves and I always hesitated. Why? I honestly felt that it could become addictive behavior and no one woman could ever satisfy me. I planned to remarry so why put myself in that position. I guess I have to live vicariously through others.
I don’t know about it becoming addictive. But it’s not for everyone to try or do for that matter.
Yes, you will have to live vicariously through others.
But what’s the harm in doing it once. LOL
We need to start a guide. “Sunny D’s Guide to Having a Threesome”
Rule number 1 seems hella important! In retrospect I believe I had an opportunity to sharpen my 3some skills with a friend girl, we have never been involved romantically (or sexually) but I think she propositioned me. This has to be the best situation for a threesome (Rule #3) not attached & some random chic that the other person trust and knows.
Like you & I discussed before. Definitely a dbl standard for me … ’cause I’m down with you, me & she. You, me & he is a fail. I can’t answer why … well I can, but we will have to go offline with that!
Even though your friend left … did you not feel some kinda way that she was there for the intro?
I didn’t feel any kind of way becuz she was there for the intro.
She was the best person for the job! Hell, she could’ve watched if she wanted to.CTFU @ We need to start a guide. “Sunny D’s Guide to Having a Threesome”
Don’t be shy to explain here. LOL
Sigh….are you in my head?! LOL I was JUST talking to a friend of mine about this. The S.O. has mentioned that he would want one simply to try it once. We’ve talked about the “rules” and my concerns with him wanting to be with the other girl afterward, what if she’s better, etc. He tried (as much as one can in this situation) to ease my concerns and tried to assure me that to him it’s just an experience to have once (more if I was down) not really a gateway to cheating, etc…supposedly it’s not that deep of a thrill or fantasy to him that he would see that happening.
We came up with:
Must be done out of state or country
No kissing
Must be done on last night of vaca
Protection (of course!)
No friends
Both of us must comfortable with the person and situation
No number/email/twitter/facebook/morse code exchanging (and he knows I have the eye of a hawk…I’ll be watching!)
Honestly, I’ve considered it…ONCE couldn’t hurt could it, lol. I’m still unsure about how I feel about another woman with my man…or with me for that matter. I mean I know it wouldn’t feel bad….but it’s a woman you know. Anyway, I’m not completely closed off to the idea…catch me after a couple shots of Patron, I’ll be more certain then lol.
CTFU @ Anyway, I’m not completely closed off to the idea…catch me after a couple shots of Patron, I’ll be more certain then lol.
I can dig….who wouldn’t have concerns? It’s completey normal.
Idk about the kissing thing….but I’m not big on kissing (depending on the situation….catch me after a few shots of anything…ctfu)
Thanks for sharing.
I’ve been around this block a few times. It knows my face. From my experiences, I agree 100% with your advice. What I find, however, from talking to other men is that most of them like the idea but can’t bring themselves to pull the trigger or can’t figure out how to negotiate the deal to bring it to reality. Having an alter ego helps. It takes you and your swagger somewhere else. Mine is Broadway Jones. Good post and very honest.
Thank you Mason..
I have known that to happen as well from females I’ve talked to.
Hmmmmmm, double standard? I don’t know, but it’s true that my wife and I have different takes on this. No biggie, it only concerns pre-marriage opinion. Anyway, here are some other double standards to ponder:
Mary Kay Letourneau? (and the politically incorrect comment about how men would love to have been molested)
Prison life for men vs. for women? (women braid each other’s hair, men rape and stab each other)
Firefighters? (Men need to carry a 220 lb. pack to pass the CPAT – Candidate Physical Aptitude Test, women 130 lbs. Who would you want rescuing your child?)
Lesbians? (Lots of lesbians say they dated men and it turned them to women, my wife asks: How come you never hear a man saying, ‘I’m sick of women, I’m going to start dating men!)
Interesting list of double standards.
But, women also get raped in prison. It’s not just men.
Thanks for commenting.
When women get raped in prison it’s usually by male guards. (Okay, I guess there are the renegade bulls) Generally it is true.
I have three young daughters, and they play with dolls and say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’, and their male peers break the hell out of everything. There’s a reason why 90% plus of violent felonies are committed by men.
Guards and other prisoners. You have to remember that some females are lesbians..
And they can rape another female with objects too.
The ‘bull dyke’ that I referred to. Of course it happens, but a lot less than in male prisons. A way way way lot less. That’s all I’m saying.
I can dig it
How did I get invited to this post? I got to stop answering requests from twitter. LOL!
Never had a threesome in my life I think I like the woman I’m with too much. Call me a sucker for love but I don’t talk to too many women that I genuinely don’t think seriously about.
I can dig that…like I said everything isn’t for everyone. Thanks for commenting. LOL
I’ve heard a lot about nervousness wrecking the threesome experience. If it ever happens to me I hope it comes up spontaneously.
I would hope so too.. Thanks for commenting!!
wow..i’ve always wondered about 3somes..but idk..never got around to planning it out..Plus I don’t know I would want another dude digging my girl out..and I don’t know what I’d do if i was knocking another girls walls down while my girl was playing background..But hey..anything is possible..
She wouldn’t play background, she would/should join in!
haha! Interesting story…I’m too soft for a threesome, I get my feelings hurt easily…but I like to fantasize about them…two men, another girl ooooohhhweee
Hmmm? @ but I like to fantasize about them…two men, another girl ooooohhhweee
I used to have a friend and he and I used to share women together. It happened a few times; and once when I was a lot younger one of my cousins and I shared a woman. It was interesting. He and I have never spoken of it again. The woman was actually one of his distant cousins, but she wasn’t related to me. Sex is something that we’re all supposed to enjoy.
Oh wow, thanks for sharing your story, Sex is something that we’re supposed to enjoy.
You pretty much took the words right out if my mouth. Threesomes are very satisfying and fulfilling until feelings become involved.
Yes. I personally could not sex the woman as I liked, only when she and I would meet up at hotel rooms.
Once upon a time, a woman stole my girlfriend after a passionate threesome. That’s why nowadays I’m like, “Fuck a threesome!”
No pun intended.
Lol…you are something else. Lol…yeah you gotta be careful when u setting one up.
I have experienced a threesome as the other girl. It was cool but the guy was threatned by me. Tired to beast me but I shiut it down immediately. Personally, if I were with someone I would not want to share him with anyone. I am stingy with MY MAN. If he were to bring it up I would say how about another guy I am sure that would end the conversation right there. I know how much we women trip on our men being with another woman in front of us. I agree if you are going make sure it is without any emotional attachments. Otherwise hurt feelings will envelope all involved.
Great rules. “There is a time and place for everything.” That’s my mantra and I’m sticking to it lol. I’ve had two threesomes and both were cool – with me. The first one broke rule #1 for the other girl so she wasn’t quite as umm appreciative. I have to laugh because what the first commenter said about them being addictive is exactly what I thought after the first one. “Participate with caution.” I think you would have to be dead from the waist down not to even casually wonder what it would be like to have your pleasure doubled oooh weee lol.Love, of course, completely changes that dynamic.
That said, every scenario/concern described above is valid. You can set all the rules you like but you never know what will happen once the doors are closed. Jealousy is a biggie, for one. People connect sexually in ways that can’t be anticipated and so there is no doubt someone out there who might be able to “do” your partner better than you. I’m just saying. For the hedonist, it’s an absolute must
Yes…no one can deny a connection so you have to be mindful of that…
Rule #1 always seems to get broken there for problems occur..I been there…so I know that all to well…but I didn’t break it…he did..lol